2008 is coming to an end

i can't really tell whether this year went by fast or slow, but either way it was a good year.
i made so many friends, i lost count. most of them are in choir, which i am really happy to be in.
it's like a family, and i'm really excited that we get to go to new york !

nothing really great happened to me this year. still no luck finding the right guy for me, sound cheesy but it's true. i feel lonely sometimes too, but not only me. all the single ladies out there. hahah.

my break so far is okay ish, the first time i hung out after getting out of school was last monday the 22nd (happy birthday kristen jabson). i went to jon reyes's house to celebrate alan yoo's birthday, which was the next day. alexis was there, alan, vivian, jojo, and jon of course. we just played rockband and looked at jon's amazing fish tank full of different kinds of fish, it was awesome.

the next day, which was the 23rd (happy birthday alan yoo), i went christmas gift shopping with my mom, then she took me to fantastic sams to get my haircut. i cut it short cause i was getting tired of my long hair, and it was dying too -__-. i also wanted it short cause you know, maybe i wanted to cut off the past and now that a new is year is coming, i'm gonna start off fresh and new.
after that, i went to the shoppes with aileen, her boyfriend derek, nina, jerald, and jeff jeff cause we were gonna watch the boat parade. we ended up walking around the shoppes a zillion times, and just sitting down and "talking" in front of barnes and nobles. it was a cold night, but the hotness of my friends made it warmer ;D.

then there was christmas eve. me and my whole family went to my cousin sean's house at chino. it was fun, but it got a little eh in the middle. there were adults, my sisters, and my cousins. all my cousins were younger than me and they were just playing games of their own. me and my sister were the oldest kids so we just sat around, took pictures, and our uncle offered us some good red wine, which i forgot the name. but he said that it was stronger than his beer. hahah. i didn't feel anything, neither did my sister. but she was told that her face was pink/red during midnight mass. hahah.

CHRISTMAS ! happy birthday jesus. woke up early for gift opening (: i got good stuffs, but the best present ever was money. isn't it ? i mean, if you get money, you can get whatever you want. it's better than just getting something you might not even use. see ? hahah. then cousins michelle and michael came over that night. watched some dvds on my sister's laptop.

the next day, michelle and michael came over again. we played videogames then we went to go watch the curious case of benjamin button at harkins that night. then we went back to my house and they slept over.

theee next day, my sister, michelle, and michael went out. i wanted to come with them, but i wanted to go shopping. so i just went to dsw with my mom, dad, baby sister, lolo, and lola. we ate at mami king :D yes, your typical filipino family. then when we arrived home, my mom takes me out to go shopping. we went to fashion joy, which is one of the stores with the cutest outfits. then kohls. the only thing i bought was a cardigan from kohls which was on sale for 12 dollars. then we went to go check out FOREVER 21 :D i swear, that's the best place ever. i wish i had a $1,000 gift card for that place. hahaha. i have my eye on a jacket ;D

theeeeeee next day, which was the 28th, was sunday. i just went to church at 3:00 cause i had to sing for the choir. pretty rockin christmas songs. i wanted my mom to take me to forever 21 so i could get that jacket i wanted, but she said she'll take me the next day.

the next day, mother did take me to forever 21. but unfortunately, that jacket didn't have my size. cause i'm a fatass. HAHAH -___-. but i got another cute jacket, and i like the color. i can't tell what the color is, but i'm guessing it's indigo. then we walked around the shoppes. we stopped by reflections, ae outfitters, sanrio, etc...

i decided that with the money i got from christmas, i'd hide half and spend half. i need to save money. haha.
so school is back on monday and i have a couple of homework to do.
the main thing i need to worry about right now is memorizing my damn soliloquy that my english teacher assigned me. i have to go look for a dvd of hamlet because my english teacher assigned me the singing scene. i don't have to sing it but he said if i did, i'd get extra credit. so i think i'm gonna sing it cause i NEED that extra credit for his class. i'm inches away from a C. i probably have that C already -___-. gaahddd....

SO i hope that next year will be way better than this year.



HAHHAHHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.. (:

last week of school for 2008

the last week of school for me has been
stressing ?
fun ?
boring ?
unorganized ?
yeah, probably all of the above.
the week before was madrigal feaste week. so i had to time whatsoever to do my homework.
that means i had ALOT of work to do that weekend, and i did.
sheeesh. i had to do a 5-page report, 15-slide powerpoint, 10 ssr journals, book report, and alot more.
i miss madrigal feaste though. all those after school rehearsals, and work days.
they were tiring, but they were fun. i get to hang out and get to know more people everytime.
but now that madrigal feaste is over, there's no more practices.
BUT nothing to worry about cause there's alot more ahead of me.
there's the NEW YORK tour in march, disneyland, and alot more concerts.
i love choir, i really do. i wish i took it last year to this year could've been my third.
i felt really accomplished on the last week of school
cause i managed to finish alllll those work assigned to me.
the only subject i pretty much have to worry about right now is english.
i feel like im doing bad. i have a B- and that's not good.
i need to step it up and raise it up to an A because i don't want to be inches away from a C.
i already have a C and that's in math.
oh well, when we get back, imma do as much extra credit as i can.
so much exciting things happened too.
i helped out my friend to ask my friend out, and i got a video of it too (:
check it out at yoredublo
i like seeing my friends happy, it makes me happy too.
now, who wants to go boy fishing with me ?
sometimes, i just feel lonely. and i freaking hate it when there's PDA everywhere you look, especially when you're feeling like this. i usually don't mind, really i don't. but everyone is getting together, and it's not only me that notices that. haha, it's pretty funny too.but hey, i guess i'll just wait, right ??
damn boys.
idk. i like someone right now. it used to be just a crush, but now it's growing and growing. i wanna tell him, but im scared. half my friends say i should, half say i shouldn't. i really don't know anymore. for now, i'll just keep it to myself. cause i know for sure he doesn't like me back. i guess i don't care. this always happens to me, so i'm pretty much used to it now. i just hate it when it happens, you know ? so i don't know. i'll see when the right time comes. i'll try to not get my hopes up too high, even if i already have. just wait...
like what brandon said, one day, i'll find the perfect guy for me. one day...

jealous

Jealous of the girl who caught your eye
One of my darker days
When you looked at her where was I?
Shoulda been in her place
Here I am
All alone imagining what might have been
What could have been
If I had been there

Jealous of the one who'se arms are around you
If she's keeping you satisfied
Jealous of the one who finally found you
Made your sun and your stars collide
La la la la la la la
She's a very very lucky girl
La la la la la la la

=[

this is not my day =[
only shoppes was the fun part. everything else was horrible.
i just found out that my mp3 player broke, and im fucking pissed.
i have to wake up early tomorrow and go to school to set up for madrigal feaste.
GO TO FUCKING MADRIGAL FEASTE cause we need people to watch.
i have so much effing homework.
choir teacher is testing soprano 1s next week.
myers told us that in two weeks, he'll make us memorize 40+ lines from hamlet and perform in front of class.
i have a test for chemistry next week.
i have a 2-chapter test for us history next week.
i have a 5-page report and a 15-slides powerpoint due in two weeks about the freaking fall of the iron curtain.
i have to read new moon and do a book report on it due in two weeks.
i have an essay due next week for fucking english.
great.
just fucking great. all this stress causes ugly fucking pimples.

gobble

happy thanksgiving to all !

mad work day

i had fun. haha.
i stayed the whole day. yes, 12 hours. we should get extra credit.
i felt so dirty at the end of the day because i was on the ground or on the stage, laying down, painting.
i didn't get my panera, which i was craving for while.
so, i got a shizload of homework to do ! i finished my chemistry, history, and asl homework.
now all i have left is my math homework, and my english homework. math is fine, we got an easy chapter. but english, i think it'll take me forever to finish tomorrow [or later...] i have to figure out the plot, settings, characters, and etc.. of the crucible and the scarlet letter. then i send that to my good friend, anne :D, then i'm gonna go on groupfusion and print out the lame grammar packet. then i'm gonna do my vocabulary chart, and study them too. and lastly, i'm gonna finish 96 questions on the scarlet letter. now, doesn't that sound so fun ? HECK NO. i hate that class. there's no way i'm gonna finish all those tomorrow. unless i wake up in the morning, but i don't want to cause i'm already tired from today. maybe i'll start my math homework right now. ugh.
oh well. excluding all the stress my classes are giving me, my friends makes my junior year better and better.

<3

via sister's laptop

so today is sunday, and i had a great day. yeesssss.
church was awesome ! retreat people came back. i stood in the back with jeff jeff agustin, lawrence ner, and alex viernes. it's pretty fun with them. we had random tickle fights, i don't know why. then alex and lawrence started saying some pretty lame jokes and pickup lines. lawrence getting hot and taking off half of his jeans to make it shorts. jeff jeff singing with his super low bass voice. then the three of them started talking about these girls they saw at the shoppes earlier. now they're checking them out cause they were at church too. then i saw alot of people, as always. cause 5:00 is the teen mass.
then after church, we went back home. i went upstairs and finished some of my homework. then jon calls me and asks if he can come over to do his homework here cause his computer isn't working ! bahaha.
i go online and find out that WE DON'T HAVE SCHOOL TOMORROW. cvusd is closed due to bad air quality or something. hahah. then i go on aim, and i have a video chat with jeff jeff ! in have no idea how long we talked.
jon left around 10:30 ish ? then my baby sister talks to jeff jeff, who was still on video chat. i have no idea why but she was acting really weird and hyper. i guess that's how she is when she's talking to my friends on the phone or online. she's always shy when she meets them in person. weird baby. but gotta love her (:
it's past twelve and i got off of the chat about 15 minutes ago maybe ? haha.
you all should get a webcam. i wanna try 6-way ! video chats are fun. especially when i'm using my sister's laptop. i had to give her coins so i could use it for the night. daanggg.

sooo everyone is pretty much staying up and sleeping in tomorrow.
i'm gonna laugh is someone shows up in school tomorrow. hahha.
fun fun weekend. i loved it.

WE festival this thursday !
i'm excited. i get to miss a day of school. but that means there's make up work the next day. ughh -___-.

fire

i have a good view of the fire from my backyard, but i'm not near it.
i'm really worried that it might get closer, and especially about my friends who live up in the canyon.
i texted and called them to see if they were okay.
this is intense. and random, too. because it's been cold in chino hills lately.
but all of a sudden, a fire pops up. a big one.
i was watching the news this morning. and there were several houses that were on fire. i feel bad for the owners. those were big houses too.
the firefighters are doing a good job on trying to lessen the fire, even though it really won't stop spreading.
i checked out a map of the fire and it's bigger than what it looks like.
what i see from my backyard is not only the smoke from the fire, but i actually see some of the fire itself.
they're also using ayala highschool as a shelter for people who had to evacuate.
i really hope those people are safe, and so are their houses.
i hope this hill in front of my house stays green, and not orange/yellow like the ones in the news.
god, please help us and watch over those people in danger.

feels good

it feels good helping people out with their problems. giving them advice and telling them what they did wrong and what they need to do to fix whatever happened. telling them cheesy lines about life, but it's true anyways.
it feels good talking to your close friends that you haven't talked to in a while because they're halfway around the world. telling them how your life is and asking them about theirs.
it feels good knowing that your friends are doing fine, and nothing it bothering them at the moment.
it feels good when you know your friends have your back no matter what. especially when there's "drama" going on.
it feels good to meet new people and see how fun they really are in the inside, even though you thought they looked mean in the outside.
it feels good when you get along with everyone in your family and don't argue for a day straight.
it feels good when you've done all your homework ahead of time, so you have more time to rest and hang out with your friends.
it feels good to laugh so hard that you're literally crying and you can barely breathe and talk at all.
it feels good when you know everything is allright.

degrassi

i haven't watched that show in a long time. but it's on right now and of course, i'm watching it.
it's past 12 am and i'm close to getting really sleepy.

so i've been keeping my eye on a certain car. dream car ? possibly. hahah.
it's a toyota prius. i like it because it doens't look like any other cars. the flat back makes it look different.
i want a red or a white one with tinted windows (: bahahah.

so today, i went to the shoppes with my dad and two sisters.
then we went to the california noodle place to eat. they have the best food, i always order the same thing.
charbroiled beef with fried rice (: yummm. my baby sister ate alot of their combination fried rice. haha.
then we went to boba loca after cause i wanted a taro slush and sister wanted cookies and cream.
so far, today was pretty fun.

tomorrow, or right now, is sunday.
gotta be at church by 3 cause i'm singing in choir.
then we don't have school on monday and tuesday. but i have sectionals to go to on monday, then right afer that i go to a group project at the park. i wanna hang out with my friends on tuesday but i have a group project at that day too. but hopefully it doesn't take the whole day.

hmm, music video of if i were a boy by beyonce is playing right now.
hahah soo lame. she acts as a cop then she pushed the bad guy in the car. then the other cop checks out her ass.
beyonce's got at amazing voice though.
i need to catch up on degrassi. maybe i should get the full season dvd cause i missed alot of episodes.
:D

weatherrrrrr

im not even lying. is mother nature PMSing right now ?
danggg. this kind of weather change is making everyone sick.

i want a small couch in my room. or a bench to put next to my window.
i've always wanted to have a window seat. i don't know why.i just think it looks cool.
and i want to know what it feels like to just sit there and stare outside your window.
it helps people think.if only we didn't have that tree on our front yard, i would have a good view of city lights if you look out my window, to the right.
and if you go out to my backyard, and stand on this one thing, you'll see a great view of the beautiful city lights.
i wish my parents had a patio on the second floor.
i'd be out there all night.
i've always dreamed of living in a house with floor to ceiling windows that had a good view of the ocean.

i want to know what it's like to live like that.
i want to be able to smell the ocean as soon as i step outside the house.
i want to feel the cold breeze we all get when we go to the beach.
i want to walk barefoot on the sand next to the seashore, preferrably with a boy (:
i want to just watch the beach at night, and hear the whales, and dolphins, and seaguls, and the waves crashing against the rocks.
i want to look up and be able to see more than 10 shining stars.
i want to just sit out there and watch the sun set.
i want to be waken up by the morning sunshine, not by an alarm clock.

there's so many things in life that i want to try out.
i'll make those my mission.
i want to accomplish those missions before i die.
i'm talking serious.

oh, life.

cold day

i really liked today's weather. it was really relaxing, and gloomy. it made me really sleepy.
but i can't sleep in my classes. that would be great, but i don't want to.
i gotta stay awake and pay attention. i WANT a's and b's. ugh, too bad i have a C+ in chemistry.
i'm trying my best to keep up and do all the possible extra credits given to us.
i'm glad i actually have a B in math. i've had bad grades in math ever since i had mrs. bridge in 8th grade.
gahd, she was a pain in the butt. she had an annoying bell, and she had that stupid easy button.
then i had mr. brown my freshman AND sophomore year. holy smokes.
he's a cool teacher, but he's not a very good one. he always told us stories. over and over and over. i always thought they were a lie. just listen to it, and you'll understand why. haha.

SO today, cold day. i'm glad i wore my favorite green sweater pullover (:
i heard it's gonna rain tomorrow. should i wear my boots ? i haven't worn those in a while.
gah, i have a busy schedule now, especially choir. but hey, im not complaining.
it's a commitment i'm gonna take.

hot damnnn.

hmm long time no post.
hahah. i've been reaaaaallly busy.
school's a pain, but oh well.
that's how it is.
junior year. what a challenge.

GO TO MADRIGAL FEASTE ;D
i got alot of songs to learn and memorize.
we have part-testing tomorrow on good christian men, rejoice.
i love that song. very catchy (:

soo anyways.

my weekend was bleh.
friday :-hallowwwweeennnn.
-erika's debut :D
-sleepover at bestfriend's.

saturday :
-good food at best friend's.
-went home and started studying.
-started my math hw.
-started my ssr journalS.
-cousin michael came over and had a saw night.
-skipped saw 2 cause the dvd was being retarted.
-skipped saw 3 cause they didn't have the dvd.
-did my journals while i watched, and i managed to get 5 journals done.

sunday :
-finished 5 more journals.
-watched saw 4, while doing hw.
-started the book report. 6 pages, helll yeah. haha.
-went to church.
-family came over to visit after church.
-asked my dad for help on my essay.
-started on it. then ideas started pouring out.
-finally finished.. just right now.
-sent it to my teacher.. before midnight. wooo.

now i am TIRED.
daylight savings time, i thank you.



yes, you'll see a portion of this post on my myspace bulletins. hahah.

singing shalalala

come on get higher by matt nathanson is the cutest song ever.
"pull me down hard, and drown me with love"

so i was video chatting with stephen rodriguez.
then i switched to gophrey, and his mom kept going in his room.
that made my night, and i talked to her in tagalog.
well actually, i typed. cause my lame mic won't work.
then i switched to cousin michelle, who i haven't seen in a long time.
and my mic started working !

hahaha but then it lagged my computer.
so i just changed my myspace song to matt nathanson.
ah, nice nice song (:

take time to realize

by cathy nguyen is what i currently hear.
she has an amazing voice.
i wish i can sing like that.

Take time to realize,
That your warmth is.
Crashing down on in.

Take time to realize,
That I am on your side
Didn't I, Didn't I tell you.

But I can't spell it out for you,
No it's never gonna be that simple
No I cant spell it out for you

If you just realize what I just realized,
Then we'd be perfect for each other
And will never find another
Just realize what I just realized
We'd never have to wonder if
We missed out on each other now.

dayumnnn.

long time no write.

annyways, today was a blast.
study groups are the best.
specially when you got the right people.
and money, and johnny rockets.
HELL YEAH to route 66.

best day of the week so far.
(:

stress relief

last week was super intense. i am HAPPY that this week was easy, fun, and fast !
it was stress-free and i loved it.

especially today.
i got my gown for choir, finally. then went to jolibee after school !
then starbucks, then alexis's house with linda, jon, and stephen.
ate, had a campfire, made smores, roasted weiners. hahaha.
tonight was really fun, and when i got home, i smelled like nothing but smoke.
i just took a shower, so im clean now. haha.
i thank stephen, well actually mrs. ramos, for the ride home.

hot dayumnnn

the weather is so weird, i swear.
its cold in the morning, then it gets hot later on.

so my fish nemo died last night.
im pretty sad about it. but hey, he lasted two weeks !
and i got him from the harvest festival. well, i WON him :D
and my friend jon is making fun of me, cause when i went to check if it really is dead, i blew on it.
hahah, lamee.

i need to start sleeping early.
i try to sleep before midnight.
i get like, four or five hours of sleep. and i usually need ten or eleven to be active.
unless i get some nice hot chocolate, then im good (:

life is so fucking hard

when you can't drive.
when you don't have a car.
when you have way too many homework.
when you have the worst teachers in the whole fucking world.
when you can't even go out.
when you don't have any money.
when you don't get what you want,
and you see others get what they want.
when you're not skinny.
when you can't wear nice clothes.
when you don't have any time to have fun.
when you can't go anywhere because no one can drive you.
when you have alot of chores.
when no one understands you.

i am so sick of crying about these things.
whatever i do, nothing seems to make me feel better.
things keep getting worse.
i feel like a failure. i feel like im not doing my best in school, but i AM.
i try to dedicate all my time studying my ass off.

im trying to SAVE money.
i want way too many things that i can't even have.
and its HARD.
to feel like this.
take my position.
and you'll see.

this causes stress.
this causes depression.
this causes all these emotions im feeling right now.
and im fucking PMSing at the same time.

WHY ?!

pain

what the heck is this pain on my left shoulderrrrrr.
more of near the neck side.
it's been aching like there's a knot for the past two days.
and i checked the mirror and it looks bigger than my right one.
ouch ouch ouch.

so im still nervous for english class.
still haven't presented my damn autobiographical powerpoint. but oh well.
that's my english class, we got public speaking -________-
i'd kill to get out of that class. i swearr.

anyways, this week is a busy week.
tomorrow is wednesday, and i have choir rehearsals after school.
then thursday, another rehearsal for womens ensemble. then we sing at the booster's night at 6pm.
then friday, we have practice after school (i think) then we sing at the homecoming football game.

i have an essay due friday.
but i don't wanna go to english class friday cause we're doing a socratic seminar.
and i hate those. UGH.
so idk, i'll seee. i'll seee.

stress stress stress.
i need sleep.
i need rest.

nemo is still alive :D
im planning on getting the whole cast of finding nemo when i get a fish tank.

YAYY. hahaha (:

love in this club

old song, but i still love it.
one of my favorite songs.

currently playing : lovebug by jonas brothers.
hmmmm, i wanna learn that on the guitar ?

so went to harvest last night.
best night so far.
after a week of lame stress and work ? harvest made my week.
specially the group of people i was with.

but sadly, i can't go tonight.
why ? my parents said we already went last night.
ugh, don't they know that it happens only once a year ? haah.

i just hate hate my life at times.
certain people make it so much harder.
lazy people. mean strict people. people who don't understand what you're going through.
annoying people. judgemental people. hurtful people.

those people should learn.
i have a life too, you know.
but unfortunately my life is taken over by school AND chores.
i hate it.
it's unfair.

give me a break.
give me a chance to go out, have fun, and come home whenever i want.
of course it's before midnight.
im not gonna get hurt, i have a house key, and im not gonna be alone.

and life is so hard when you can't drive.
and when NO ONE can drive you anywhere.
maybe cause they're lazy to ? yeah. YEAH.

i can't drive. i don't have my license. i don't have a car.
and i don't have any friends legal enough to drive me.

ugh.

so many things

so many things i can't wait for.

i can't wait for all the choirs to rehearse together.
i can't wait for the homecoming game.
i can't wait for the harvest festival.
i can't wait for christmas.
i can't wait for women's ensemble festivals.
i can't wait for the madrigal feaste.
i can't wait to get my gown.
i can't wait to go to new york.

and there's alot more.

so many things i want. so many things i crave. so many things i dream for.

i want to drive already.
i crave haru haru bscr roll.
i dream for what all girls dream and drool over, a boy.
i want to be rich.
i want to be able to go places whenever i want.
i crave for joghurt.
i dream to go to a great college.


agggkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk.

so i've been sniffling the whole day.
and sneezing every now and then.
idk why but i hate sneezing in public.
if i had those really quiet sneezes, i'd love to sneeze whenever i want.
but nooooo.
my sneeze is like an EXPLOSION. ka-booom.
you'll probably hear it echo.
and you'll feel the earth shake.
that's how my sneeze is.

how nice, how very very nice.

cutee

one smile, one wave, one laugh.
it makes my day.
he makes me feel giggly inside (:

oh, i liked today.

oh wow, that rhymed :D

it feels so good

to know that you've inspired someone to do something.
one of the best feelings in your life.
im not even kidding.

im glad i can help out other people, just like they help me when i need them.
true friends are friends that are there for you no matter what.
they're always listening to you while you vent, and they won't ever think negative.
they'll find ways to make you happier, to help you solve your problems.
to give you one of the greatest advice you've ever gotten.
now those are true friends.

we all know life gets tough, but you gotta remember to never ever give up.
because that's the worst thing you can ever do, next to killing your health with smoking and drugs.
i mean, seriously.. what's the point in doing that ?
i know people get stressed, and they do those things to "feel better"
but there are ALOT more ways to solve your stress problems.
don't do things that make you feel better, but KILLS.

talk to your family, talk to your friends. they can help you change your life.



here are a few people who've told me i've inspired them, and they inspire me too (:

http://drayy.blogspot.com
http://brandontheho.blogspot.com

(:

coffee ice cream

is by far, the best flavor ever made... for me (:

so today, monday, was preeeettty chilllll.
i'm happy we didn't have any literature book work for english.
but we do tomorrow -____-. god i just hate how he calls random people
and make them summarize the short story he made us read, or ask us questions.
myers is seriously killing my junior year.

but what makes my day is seing this cute boy.
HAAAHHHA yes, a boy. going to second period, and other passing periods.
i can't stop but stare at his perfect smile. HAHAHHA :D

sooo anyways.
i just recently found out that the choir tour to new york is on a school day !
so i'm pretty much gonna miss a week of school.
easy for some people, but not for me.
im a freaking junior, hence all the work and stress pouring out and taking over my bubble.

STAY OUT OF MY BUBBLE.
i wish i can make that happen, but i can't.
so i guess i'll just do my best and try to not lag behind.
if i start lagging, everything will start falling apart.

today, i was told by desiree perez that i've inspired her to start blogging like this.
and im glad i did. cause this blogging thing helps alot.
if i have no one else to talk to, i got this.
i vent vent vent.

so if you don't like reading my blog, then that's not my problem.
you should've at least read the big letters on the top of this screen.
"raffiapiaaa VENTS"


thank you very much.

it is sunday

and tomorrow is mondaaaay.

today started off quiet.
i had a really rough night that involved tears, thanks to my parents -______-.
i fell asleep on my floor, yes, my floor. and woke up at around 11:30.
then i had to walk to the bathroom with my eyes closed cause i couldn't open them.
you know, when you cry alot and after sleeping, it's all puffy and you can't open them.
yeah, that happened, so i struggled to go to the bathroom.
but i managed to get there safe. just less than ten steps away.
so i wash my face, brushed my teeth, then went back to sleep on my bed this time.

the next day, my grandma wakes me up around 8 or 9. but i just covered my face with my blanket.
i was depressed. i didn't feel like getting up.
so i slept again. and woke up at around 10 or 11.
then i still didn't feel like getting up, so i just rolled around.
then finally, i got up past noon, went to the bathroom with my eyes closed again.
washed my face, brushed my teeth, went peeeee.
then i went back to my room and continued the homework i didn't finish last night.
my eyes were puffy, so it was hard.
i had to rest every 10-15 minutes.

around 1, i started getting hungry.
i haven't been downstairs yet, so i figured i should just go and get something to eat.
i didn't say anything to my dad, who was sitting at the other dinner table, the formal one.
so i went to the kitchen, got something to eat blah blah blah.

sooo time passes and we go to church.
me, my sisters, and my dad. my mom was at work.
so i got my normal eyes back, what a relief.
mr. stephen rodriguez kept me and my sisters company at the mother's chapel at church (:
then i see adriel, who i haven't seen in the longestttt time ! yaaaay.

thennnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn after church, we went back home.
now, im procrastinating. but i only have one more hw, which is math.
i should start working on my autobiographical powerpoint. it's due on friday.
but presentations are next week.

i used to know how to do powerpoint. but i forgot now.
so imma ask my sister for help !

yessss. now, im gonna try to focus on my math hw and get it done asap.

i hope tomorrow's a good day. i can tell (:
after a rough weekend, i hope i have a good week. please.

im craving ice cream, damnnnn.

oh ugly day

currently listening to : thunder acoustic by boys like girls.

i wish for too many things.
i wish i can drive.
i wish i had my license.
i wish i had a car.
i wish i had straight As.
i wish my parents would understand me.
i wish i can read minds.
i wish i can control minds.
i wish i had a boy.
i wish i can go out anytime.
i wish homework never took up all of my time.
i wish i had a clear face.
i wish i had money.
i wish my grandpa was out of the hospital.
i wish i was good in math.
i wish i had a nice job.
i wish i had a lock on my door.
i wish i was skinny.
i wish i don't have blackheads.
i wish i had a purple guitar.
i wish i can last a day without getting tired and just having fun !

if all these wishes come true, then i will definitely be the happiest person alive.

what the hell

is wrong with my faceeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.
i guess stress does cause breakouts D:
then parts of it are getting dry, and it hurts, even when i put lotion on it doesn't help.

so my dad is being soo strict when it gets to him having to drive us somewhere.
even when it's for school. if only i could drive. i wish my mom was here.
but she's at work. she's nicer when it gets to this stuffs.
i miss her too. i barely see her anymore.
i leave for school in the morning and she's still sleeping, and when i get home from school,
sometimes she's there, sometimes she already left for work.
then she works untill midnight, and of course i'm already asleep by then.
the only days i see her is when she's off from work.
mann.

and my baby sister is being the biggest brat. ugh.
whatever, im about to do homework.
i still feels like i haven't been doing good enough to get nice As.
but i am ! -____-

so i have to :
read my book, then do an SSR journal.
do all the questions assigned to us on chapter three for chemistry.
do my alg 2 homework.
do the stupid us history ch 2 study guide.

then if i have time, i have to start working on my autobiographical powerpoint.
alshjfljaslfdoisaurtajretw9485owfjjsadflkjsalk jsafdlkjsa09odufwlsejrs !

if only i had the power to control minds.

pretty funny

so my cousins michelle and michael came over this afternoon
cause michelle got her laptop and she asked my dad if he can install all the stuffs in it.
so i was studying dowstairs while they were installing and stuffs.
then cousin michael sits right next to me, grabs a pen, and starts doodling on my arm like it was a piece of paper.
according to him, it's a SQUISHY SURFACE. hahaha, thankss !
so i wrote on his, then he wrote on mine, then i wrote on his
untill our whole arm was covered.
i washed it off, but there's still some left. and the ink looks purple.
hahaha, dang. i might be going to school with it.

sooo i actually should be sleeping right now.
did my nightly routine.
took a shower, brushed my teeth, etc...
then i set the alarm on my spongebob alarm clock for 5:00 am, and my cellphone to 5:30 am.
the reason why i have two alarms is for just in case i don't hear the first one.
cause lately, i noticed that i'm pretty much DEAF when i'm sleeping.
this spongbob alarm clock is really loud, and there's no doubt that it won't wake you up.
and it doesn't seem to work on me. hahaha wow.
don't worry, my ears are clean clean. i can't stand not cleaning them after i shower.
it feels weird.

soo it's five minutes till twleve and i should be tucking myself into bed right now.
fluffing my pillows, and finding the perfect spot where i can just fall asleep in peace.

so that's all for now, goodnight to all !

gahhh

school is pretty much taking over my days.
i barely have time to have fun.
junior year is like hell, but hey, we have this year and one more to go.
and we're out of highschool.

im sitting here, and all my book are on the desk.
they're staring at me. algebra 2, chemistry, english.
i have a couple of homework for today.
i'll start off with my algebra 2 homework.
then i'll go and read the short stories assigned to us by my english teacher.
i have to know exactly what happens in the story, cause he picks out people randomly
and ask them to either summarize the story, or ask them questions about it.
then i'll move on to starting on my flow chart for chemistry
cause it says we have a lab tomorrow.

i swear, teachers this year are no help.
they don't tell us when they post any new assignments online or what not.
they don't teach us well, and then they give us tests.
they give us a study guide to "help" us with the test, but none of those questions on the study guide are on the tests.

isn't that just wonderful ?
my goal this year is to TRY my best to get straight As.
i doubt that'll happen, so maybe As and Bs.
i didn't really take school seriously my freshman and sophomore year.
now that school just started, it's time for me to start off fresh and clean.
ill listen to the teacher, and do my homework without procrastinating.
but im pretty much procrastinating right now, haha.

so we had an algebra 2 test last week, and i thought i did good.
but nooo, she gave me a 69%.. which is what.. a D+ ?!?!?!
thank goodness she's letting people who got below 70 to re-take the test.

school would be easy if the teachers were good teachers.
this is pretty much the biggest issue i've whined about.
school, school, school. especially this year with my "english CP" teacher.
CP means college prep, not AP !
we have MORE work than the AP classes, is he nuts ?
i guess he is.

he should just switch the class name to english 11 AP.
or hell class.

hahhh.

damn

today was a lame day, yes it was.
english was the usual nerve wrecking for me. i seriously hate that class.
the teacher is too, strict. well for me he is.
at least i have it first period so i can get it over with !
but it pretty much ruins my day, that's what sucks.

i had a test second period. not much people studied for it.
pretty funny, my whole table and other people were cheating.
it was easy to cheat with that sub. although the test was eh.

third period, we started working on the song "ave maria"
soprano has some preeeetty high notes there too.
i can do it, i hope !

fourth period was the usuallllllllllll.
i don't like this "apple" book. especiall the fact that the teacher reads/signs it to us.
and i sometimes can't catch up with the signing cause i forgot most of them over the summer.
should've praticed...

today was club week.
not sure if im joining a club, ill see.
if i wanna get a cord when i graduate, i gotta join asl club
this year and my senior year.
so ill see, ill see.

fifth period we got our tests back.
holy dung, i dont wanna talk about it.
that teacher need to explain more clearly.

sixth period, we still don't do anything at all.
we're supposed to have a test today.
but luckily, the teacher re-scheduled it to tomorrow.
so i made the 3x5 notecards and i'm ready.

right now, im supposed to be sleeping. but i can't. but i have to.
i haven't been sleeping early enough lately.
thanks thanks big thanks to school.

ah, lord help me.

procrastinate

i had a blog before this one, but i forgot my password.
i never really used it over the summer, that's why.

i finished all my homework.
now all that is left for me to do is to study.

my chemistry book is sitting right in front of me.
open, but the page remain the same.
that's because i'm procrastinating, and it's bad.

i met my chemistry teacher the first three days of school.
stevens, for honors.. yes, she's a new teacher.
she told us she was gonna have a surgery that week.
so she looked for a sub.

so right now, we haven't learned anything.
we had to do work by ourselves.
stevens assigned us questions to do on the book.
our current sub right now, hasn't taught us anything that is in the book.
and that actually made sense to us.

he's funny and i like how he can't hear you much
and when he's doing roll call, he mispronounces almost all our names.
"ra fee ye lee re du bee yo ?"

hahah funny old man.
i like my class though. actually, i love it.
i have desiree perez, jenna custodio, and regina reyes in my table.
this will be one great year. one great, busy busy year.

so right now, im "about" to stop my procrastination
and focus on the book, not the computer screen.

chemistry chemistry chemistry.
i love science.
but it's better when your real teacher is there to teach you right.

wish me luck and hope i get an A !